Harry Potter and the Must-Lose-A-Few Stone

23 Jan

We ran a poll on our Facebook page (which – casual plug – you can like here). The poll asked:

If you could do one thing this year, what would it be?

Three guesses what the response was – particularly considering the title.

BECOME A WIZARD.

Yeah, that’s right. The majority of our readers want 2013 to be the year they turn into a wizard. Somehow, we need to turn this into a blog post. I figured that the best way to go about this would be to give you ten top weight loss tips, Rowling-style. Let’s see how this goes…

Harry’s let himself go a bit! – All rights to adventuresofadamnfool.com

  1. Don’t cut out all the food you enjoy. In the wizarding world, takeaway is easy to order. All you’ve got to do is tickle a pear in a portrait, and you have unlimited access to the kitchen. I recommend you save up your calories. I’d say put them in Gringotts, but you might end up ‘goblin’ anyway…
  2. Take your quill and everlasting ink and write everything down.  It’s only if you write things down that you know what you are doing. I’m not saying that you can’t have that eighth chocolate frog, but you’re only really aware of what you’re eating when you see it in front of you.
  3. I find sticking a wedding invitation or holiday photograph of places you’d like to apparate to in your best dress robes in the kitchen. All the motion in the photographs will get the photographic you slim, even if you don’t.
  4. Use scales in the kitchen – before you stick a whole bezoar down your throat, bear in mind that you can trick yourself with the amount of stuff you’re sticking in your potion. Weight it out for accurate measurements!
  5. I think it is a good idea to buy some new robes when you are down a size or two. That way, you are reminded of what you have achieved and not to go back to old sizes. Chuck out the old stuff or give it away.

    Herp. All rights go to henrypq.com

    Herp. All rights go to henrypq.com

  6. Life is too short so build in treats! Have that glass of butterbeer or some acid pops and fizzy slugs, but remember that moderation is key.
  7. Be honest with yourself. Don’t go all Nearly Headless Nick every time you go over your calorie count, but your average calorie intake is important. Don’t to too Severe-us on yourself!
  8. It’s not transfiguration or sitting your N.E.W.Ts, but exercise  with sustained weight loss is the key to the Winged Key to sustained weight loss. It’s not difficult – pick up your broom and play some Quidditch, go digging for some mandrakes or save an entire planet from Voldemort if you want. As long as you’re sweating, you’re doing something!
  9. Always measure alcohol consumed at home carefully, as it is easy to fool yourself. 10 units of alcohol a night equals 10 points from Griffindor.
  10. Don’t ever give up! Harry never gave up, and we’ve all read how crappily-ever-after his life turned out ‘Nineteen Years Later’!

(adapted from the original tips from weightlossresources.co.uk)

ABOVE ALL, don’t be a Moaning Myrtle and do something about your diet. Be pro-active, pro-muggle and pro-House-elf rights. It’s like Dumbledore said:

It’s our choices, Harry that shows who we truly are far more than our abilities.

Many thanks to Ash Northall, Blythe Buttery, Ryan Egan, Clemsta A-Reiff and Rhea Smith for allowing this post to happen.

Take care. CS. x

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